It is said concerning the holy Ari, z”l (Emek HeMelech, Intro. III, Chapter 4, 11b) that in his lifetime the wicked lived in terror because whenever he saw them he would reveal to them every detail of the transgressions that each of them had committed over the past fifty years. And even if someone merely contemplated sin in his heart the Ari would reveal it. For this reason the wicked would flee from him in shame so that he would not gaze at them and reveal their guilt. A person should take to this to heart. For if such is the disgrace the sinner feels in the presence of a mere human who uncovers his sins through Divine insight, how much greater will be his shame when he comes before the King of the Universe, the Holy One Blessed is He and His Throne of Glory! For the Holy One Blessed is He will reveal his every utterance and will even summon witnesses. Moreover, the person’s own hand will record his deeds. What, then, will he do on the day of his judgment? But who knows whether he will even merit appearing before his blessed Creator? Perhaps his soul will fall into the hands of cruel angels upon expiration and will be brought to a deep, dark place with no illumination, to remain there until a defender is finds some merit in him or in a descendant who studies Torah. For we find that many sinners were only saved from the destroyers, may Heaven spare us, through such merit.
It is related, for example, in Midrash HaNe’elam, Parashas Lech Lecha (Zohar Chadash, 60a): A certain man went to the mountains of Ararat along with two other sages. They saw there openings in the ground from which fire and smoke were pouring forth and they heard the voice of a man crying, “Woe! Woe!” “Surely this place is a part of Gehinnom,” they surmised. Then they sat down there and dozed off. In their sleep they heard the groans of a man who was gathering large bundles of thistles, which he carried upon his shoulders. Two officers from Gehinnom followed after him, igniting the bundles with fire and burning him as he went. “Woe! Woe!” the man cried. But the officers responded, “If only you had taken note of the lovingkindness that the Holy One Blessed is He did for you as He does with the rest of the righteous, granting them two angels to guard them, as it states, ‘He will command His angels to guard you in all your ways’ (Tehillim 91:11). For then you would have been spared this punishment. But you abandoned Hashem your God and did not keep the Torah. Instead you heeded the evil inclination and joined with the company of the wicked known as, ‘cut down thistles’ (Yeshayahu 33:12). It is these thistles that are now burning you.”
The Jewish traveler asked the man, “Who are you?” “I am a Jew,” he replied, “and I committed many sins and iniquities. I have forgotten my name and the officers of Gehinnom refuse to reveal it to me. I have forgotten it on account of the terrible, bitter and evil afflictions that I am made to suffer. Five times a day I am condemned to be burned, three times during the day and twice at night. This is because I indulged in five types of intimate relations forbidden by the Torah.” Afterwards the traveler asked him from where he came. He replied that he was from the Upper Galilee in the Land of Israel and that he had left behind him a young son. Then he said: “I sinned greatly and the angel in charge of graves said to me at the time of my judgment, ‘Woe to the one who swore to keep the Torah but failed to do so! Woe to the hands that manipulated forbidden items! Woe to the legs that went to perform forbidden deeds!’ “Then as they cruelly administered my lashes they recounted in detail each of my sins. I also was compelled to admit that I did indeed do such-and-such. I was unable to tell lies because the angels appointed over my soul were standing there with documents in their hands, upon which were recorded the details of all the transgressions I committed and my own signature was inscribed beneath the writing.”
Afterwards the Jew went from place to place in the Upper Galilee inquiring whether anyone had recently died leaving a young son. Finally in a certain place he received a positive response and was informed that the child had gone to the slaughterhouse and that he was as evil as his father. So the man went to the slaughterhouse and contemplated the child, who was playing with the youths who were there. The Jew said to him, “My son, come with me.” So he came with him and the man provided him with clothes and found him a teacher to teach him Torah. The teacher taught him a great deal until he became one of the most promising of the students. Then he taught him to read from the [Book of] Prophets in the Synagogue and to pray with the congregation. The young man grew even more learned until eventually people began to call him “Rabbi.” At that point the evildoer appeared to the Jew in a dream and said to him, “Rabbi, may the Holy One Blessed is He console you as you have consoled me. For when my son read from the Prophets in the synagogue they exempted me from harsh judgment. And when he led the prayers and recited Kaddish they tore up my sentence in Gehinnom altogether. “And when my son grew more learned and they began calling him “Rabbi,” I was crowned with the crown of the righteous. It was only because of you that I earned all this merit. Fortunate is your lot, for you have brought me into the World to Come. Fortunate is your lot in this world and fortunate is your lot in the World to Come!”
We find a similar incident in Kallah Rabbasi (Chapter 2) in which Rabbi Akiva encountered an evildoer to whom the destroying angels were administering punishment. Rabbi Akiva asked him if he had a son, to which he replied that he did. He also told him where the boy lived. So Rabbi Akiva went to that place and taught the boy to recite the Kaddish. Then the boy responded, Amein, yehei shemeih raba mevorach le’olam ulolmei olmayo, and the evildoer was immediately released from his suffering. Afterwards he appeared to Rabbi Akiva and informed him that he had been freed from his afflictions. Rabbi Akiva then recited the verse, “Hashem, Your remembrance endures throughout the generations!” (Tehillim 135:13).
This should awaken a person to watch over his children carefully and to teach them Torah and guide them in awe of Hashem because a son can bring his father merit. By the same token, one whose father or mother has passed away must be scrupulous in reciting the Kaddish and responding, Amein, yehei shemeih raba, with all his might. For through this he elevates his father’s soul to the upper Gan Eden. Let him not emulate those who take the Kaddish lightly, treating it as a kind of joke and actually making sport of its recital. They do not realize that Heaven and earth depend on the Kaddish. The response, Amein, yehei shemeih raba, contains twenty-eight letters, corresponding to the twenty-eight letters in the first verse of the Torah, “In the beginning God created the Heaven and the earth” (Bereishis 1:1). This is an allusion to what is stated in Tehillim, “The power of His deeds He has declared to His people” (111:6). For the numerical value of the word “power” — koach — is twenty-eight. The first verse of the Ten Commandments also contains twenty-eight letters: “And God spoke all these things, saying” (Shemos 20:1). Therefore our teacher Rabbi Yehudah Chassid used to instruct the congregation to recite the first verse of Bereishis, followed by the one from the Ten Commandments and afterwards, Amein, yehei shemeih raba. The esoteric meaning of this custom is explained in Megaleh Amukos (Ofen 212).
In light of this a mourner reciting Kaddish for a parent should be careful to recite it with great concentration. It is important that the one reciting Kaddish also respond, Amein, yehei shemeih raba. Let him not emulate the ignorant who stop at the words, “And say Amein” [ve’imru Amein] and then continue with the words “May the name be blessed and praised” [yisborach veyishtabach]. Rather, he must also say, Amein, yehei shemeih raba because that is the most essential part of the Kaddish. In this way he brings pleasure to the Holy One Blessed is He as well as to his father and mother. If a person has no sons let him take an orphan into his home and raise him in the study of Torah and the service of Hashem. For perhaps the father and mother of the orphan were wicked and now their son will bring them merit. Then the one who raised him will have earned a great reward in this world and the next. On the other hand, if someone raises an orphan in his home only in order that he should serve him, then not only does he receive no reward, he is severely punished. For just as a virtuous son brings merit to his father, so does a wicked son cause his parents to be punished because they failed to rebuke him while they were alive. It is for this reason that the sin of the son is visit upon his parents. But if the deceased left a young son and someone else raised him, then they do not punish the father but the one who raised him. Concerning this was it stated, “Each man for his own sin shall they be killed” (Devarim 24:16).
Therefore I will now present you with a chapter devoted to the subject of raising children. There it will be noted that a father is commanded to rebuke his son while the son is commanded to fulfill his father’s words. This is in order that people will not say of him, “Cursed is the one who bore him; cursed is the one who raised him” (Sanhedrin 52a). Then he will be able to go to the next world without shame, Amein.
אָמְרוּ עַל הַקָּדוֹשׁ הָאֲרִ"י, זִכְרוֹנוֹ לִבְרָכָה, שֶׁבְּיָמָיו הָיָה נוֹפֵל פַּחַד גָּדוֹל עַל כָּל הָרְשָׁעִים, בַּעֲבוּר שֶׁכְּשֶׁרָאָה אוֹתָן, הָיָה מַגִּיד לָהֶם כָּל פְּרָטֵי הָעֲבֵרוֹת שֶׁל כָּל אֶחָד וְאֶחָד שֶׁהָיָה חוֹטֵא מִזְּמַן חֲמִשִּׁים שָׁנָה. וַאֲפִלּוּ אִם אָדָם הָיָה מְהַרְהֵר עֲבֵרָה בְּלִבּוֹ, הָיָה מַגִּיד לָהֶם. וְהָיוּ הָרְשָׁעִים בּוֹרְחִים מִמֶּנּוּ מִפְּנֵי הַבּוּשָׁה, שֶׁלֹּא יִסְתַּכֵּל בָּהֶם וְיַגִּיד פִּשְׁעָם. וְעַל זֶה יָשִׂים אָדָם אֶל לִבּוֹ: אִם כֵּן, יֵשׁ בּוּשָׁה וּכְלִמָּה מִפְּנֵי יְלוּד אִשָּׁה, אֲשֶׁר רוּחַ הַקֹּדֶשׁ שׁוֹרָה עָלָיו וּמַכִּיר חֲטָאָיו, עַל אַחַת כַּמָּה וְכַמָּה שֶׁצָּרִיךְ בּוּשָׁה בְּעֵת בּוֹאוֹ לִפְנֵי מֶלֶךְ מַלְכֵי הַמְּלָכִים הַקָּדוֹשׁ בָּרוּךְ הוּא, וְלִפְנֵי כִּסֵּא כְּבוֹדוֹ, וְהַקָּדוֹשׁ בָּרוּךְ הוּא יַגִּיד לוֹ מַה שִּׂיחוֹ, וְעֵדִים מְעִידִים עָלָיו, וִידֵי אָדָם בְּעַצְמוֹ כּוֹתְבִין כָּל מַעֲשָׂיו. מַה יַּעֲשֶׂה הָאָדָם בְּיוֹם פָּקְדוֹ? וּמִי יוֹדֵעַ, אִם יִזְכֶּה לָבוֹא לִפְנֵי בּוֹרְאוֹ יִתְבָּרַךְ, פֶּן יִפֹּל בִּידֵי אַכְזָרִים. בְּצֵאת נִשְׁמָתוֹ יָבוֹא נִשְׁמָתוֹ שֶׁל אָדָם בִּמְקוֹם אֹפֶל וְעֹמֶק, שֶׁלֹּא יִרְאֶה עוֹד עַד שֶׁתְּעוֹרֵר עָלָיו אֵיזֶה פְּרַקְלִיט שֶׁל זְכוּת אוֹ מִיּוֹצְאֵי חֲלָצָיו, שֶׁיִּהְיוּ עוֹסְקִים בַּתּוֹרָה, כִּדְמָצִינוּ הַרְבֵּה שֶׁלֹּא נִצּוֹלוּ מִיַּד הַמַּשְׁחִיתִים, בַּר מִנַּן, כִּי אִם בְּזֶה הַזְּכוּת.
It is said concerning the holy Ari, z”l (Emek HeMelech, Intro. III, Chapter 4, 11b) that in his lifetime the wicked lived in terror because whenever he saw them he would reveal to them every detail of the transgressions that each of them had committed over the past fifty years. And even if someone merely contemplated sin in his heart the Ari would reveal it. For this reason the wicked would flee from him in shame so that he would not gaze at them and reveal their guilt. A person should take to this to heart. For if such is the disgrace the sinner feels in the presence of a mere human who uncovers his sins through Divine insight, how much greater will be his shame when he comes before the King of the Universe, the Holy One Blessed is He and His Throne of Glory! For the Holy One Blessed is He will reveal his every utterance and will even summon witnesses. Moreover, the person’s own hand will record his deeds. What, then, will he do on the day of his judgment? But who knows whether he will even merit appearing before his blessed Creator? Perhaps his soul will fall into the hands of cruel angels upon expiration and will be brought to a deep, dark place with no illumination, to remain there until a defender is finds some merit in him or in a descendant who studies Torah. For we find that many sinners were only saved from the destroyers, may Heaven spare us, through such merit.
וְכִדְאִיתָא בַּמִּדְרָשׁ הַנֶּעֱלָם פָּרָשַׁת לֶךְ לְךָ: גַּבְרָא חַד אָזִיל לְבֵי טוּרֵי קַרְדִּינַיָּא (פֵּרוּשׁ: הָרֵי אֲרָרָט) הוּא וּתְרֵין חַכִּימִין עִמֵּיהּ, וַחֲמוּ גֻּמִּין בְּקִיעִין וְאֶשָּׁא וּתְנָנָא נָפִיק מִן גֻּמִּין. וְשָׁמְעוּ חַד גַּבְרָא דְּאָמַר: וַי, וַי! אָמְרוּ: וַדַּאי אֲתַר דָּא מִדּוּכְתֵּיהּ דְּגֵיהִנָּם הוּא. יַתְבֵי תַּמָּן וְאִדְמוּךְ, וְשַׁמְעִין קוֹל אֲנָחָה מִן חַד גְּבַר, דַּהֲוֵי מְאַסֵּף קוֹצִים חֲבִילוֹת גְּדוֹלוֹת, וְהָיָה נוֹשֵׂא עַל כְּתֵפָיו, וּשְׁנֵי מְמֻנִּים מִן גֵּיהִנָּם הוֹלְכִים אַחֲרָיו, וְהָיוּ מַדְלִיקִין הַחֲבִילוֹת בָּאֵשׁ וְשׂוֹרְפִין אוֹתוֹ בַּהֲלִיכָתוֹ, וְהַאי גַּבְרָא הֲוֵי צוֹעֵק בְּקוֹל מַר: וַי, וַי! וְהַמְמֻנִּים הָיוּ מְשִׁיבִין אוֹתוֹ: אִם הָיִיתָ מַשְׁגִּיחַ עַל חֶסֶד שֶׁעָשָׂה הַקָּדוֹשׁ בָּרוּךְ הוּא עִמְּךָ, כְּמוֹ שֶׁהַקָּדוֹשׁ בָּרוּךְ הוּא עוֹשֶׂה עִם שְׁאָר צַדִּיקִים, שֶׁנּוֹתֵן הַקָּדוֹשׁ בָּרוּךְ הוּא לָהֶם שְׁנֵי מַלְאָכִים לִשְׁמֹר אוֹתָם, כַּמָּה דְּאַתְּ אָמַר: כִּי מַלְאָכָיו יְצַוֶּה לָךְ לִשְׁמָרְךָ בְּכָל דְּרָכֶיךָ — אָז הָיִיתָ נִצּוֹל מֵהָעֹנֶש הַזֶּה. וְאַתָּה עָזַבְתָּ אֶת ה' אֱלֹהֶיךָ, וְלֹא שָׁמַרְתָּ אֶת הַתּוֹרָה, וְעָשִׂיתָ אֶת רְצוֹן יֵצֶר הָרָע וְנִתְחַבַּרְתָּ עִם כִּתּוֹת שֶׁל רְשָׁעִים, הַנִּקְרָאִים 'קוֹצִים כְּסוּחִים', וּבְקוֹצִין כָּאֵלּוּ הֵן שׂוֹרְפִין אוֹתְךָ.
It is related, for example, in Midrash HaNe’elam, Parashas Lech Lecha (Zohar Chadash, 60a): A certain man went to the mountains of Ararat along with two other sages. They saw there openings in the ground from which fire and smoke were pouring forth and they heard the voice of a man crying, “Woe! Woe!” “Surely this place is a part of Gehinnom,” they surmised. Then they sat down there and dozed off. In their sleep they heard the groans of a man who was gathering large bundles of thistles, which he carried upon his shoulders. Two officers from Gehinnom followed after him, igniting the bundles with fire and burning him as he went. “Woe! Woe!” the man cried. But the officers responded, “If only you had taken note of the lovingkindness that the Holy One Blessed is He did for you as He does with the rest of the righteous, granting them two angels to guard them, as it states, ‘He will command His angels to guard you in all your ways’ (Tehillim 91:11). For then you would have been spared this punishment. But you abandoned Hashem your God and did not keep the Torah. Instead you heeded the evil inclination and joined with the company of the wicked known as, ‘cut down thistles’ (Yeshayahu 33:12). It is these thistles that are now burning you.”
אָמַר הַאי גַּבְרָא יְהוּדָאִי לְהַהוּא חַיָּבָא: מַאן אַנְתְּ? אָמַר לֵיהּ: יְהוּדָאִי אֲנִי. וְהַרְבֵּה חֲטָאִים וּפְשָׁעִים עָשִׂיתִי, וְשָׁכַחְתִּי שְׁמִי, וּמְמֻנִּים דְּגֵיהִנָּם אֵין רוֹצִין לְגַלּוֹת לִי אֶת שְׁמִי. וְגַם אֲנִי שָׁכַחְתִּי אֶת שְׁמִי מִתּוֹךְ הַיִּסּוּרִים קָשִׁים מָרִים וְרָעִים, וַחֲמִשָּׁה פְּעָמִים דָּנִים אוֹתִי בִּשְׂרֵפָה, בְּכָל יוֹם שָׁלשׁ פְּעָמִים, וּבְכָל לַיְלָה שְׁתֵּי פְּעָמִים, לְפִי שֶׁעָבַרְתִּי עַל חָמֵשׁ עֲרָיוֹת שֶׁבַּתּוֹרָה. וְאַחַר כָּךְ שָׁאַל אוֹתוֹ הַאי גַּבְרָא מֵאֵיזֶה מָקוֹם הוּא, וְהֵשִׁיב שֶׁהוּא מִגָּלִיל הָעֶלְיוֹן שֶׁבְּאֶרֶץ יִשְׂרָאֵל, וְהִנִּיחַ בֶּן קָטָן בְּמָקוֹם אֶחָד בַּגָּלִיל הָעֶלְיוֹן. וְאַחַר כָּךְ אָמַר לוֹ: הַרְבֵּה חָטָאתִי, וּמַלְאָךְ אֶחָד מִתְּחִלָּה הָיָה דָּן אוֹתִי בְּיִסּוּרִים קָשִׁים וּמָרִים יוֹתֵר מִשְּׂרֵפָה זוֹ, וּמַלְאָךְ הַמְמֻנֶּה עַל הַקְּבָרוֹת אָמַר לִי בִּשְׁעַת הַדִּין: אוֹי לְמִי שֶׁנִּשְׁבַּע עַל הַתּוֹרָה לְקַיֵּם אוֹתָהּ וְלֹא קִיֵּם! אוֹי לַיָּדַיִם שֶׁשִּׁמְּשׁוּ בַּדְּבָרִים הָאֲסוּרִים! אוֹי לְרַגְלַיִם שֶׁהָלְכוּ לִדְבָרִים אֲסוּרִים! וּבִשְׁעַת הַהַכָּאָה שֶׁהָיוּ מַכִּין בִּי בְּאַכְזָרִיּוּת, הָיוּ אוֹמְרִים לְפָנַי כָּל פְּרָטֵי חֲטָאִים שֶׁעָשִׂיתִי, וְגַם אֲנִי אָמַרְתִּי: אֱמֶת, כָּךְ וְכָךְ עָשִׂיתִי, כִּי לֹא יָכֹלְתִּי לְשַׁקֵּר, כִּי נִשְׁמָתִי וּמַלְאָכִים הַמְמֻנִּים עַל נִשְׁמָתִי הָיוּ עוֹמְדִים, וּבְיָדָם כְּתָבִים, וְשָׁם נִרְשַׁם כָּל פְּרָטֵי דְּבָרִים וּפְרָטֵי עֲבֵרוֹת שֶׁעָשִׂיתִי, וְיָדִי הִיא חֲתוּמָה תַּחַת הַכְּתָבִים.
The Jewish traveler asked the man, “Who are you?” “I am a Jew,” he replied, “and I committed many sins and iniquities. I have forgotten my name and the officers of Gehinnom refuse to reveal it to me. I have forgotten it on account of the terrible, bitter and evil afflictions that I am made to suffer. Five times a day I am condemned to be burned, three times during the day and twice at night. This is because I indulged in five types of intimate relations forbidden by the Torah.” Afterwards the traveler asked him from where he came. He replied that he was from the Upper Galilee in the Land of Israel and that he had left behind him a young son. Then he said: “I sinned greatly and the angel in charge of graves said to me at the time of my judgment, ‘Woe to the one who swore to keep the Torah but failed to do so! Woe to the hands that manipulated forbidden items! Woe to the legs that went to perform forbidden deeds!’ “Then as they cruelly administered my lashes they recounted in detail each of my sins. I also was compelled to admit that I did indeed do such-and-such. I was unable to tell lies because the angels appointed over my soul were standing there with documents in their hands, upon which were recorded the details of all the transgressions I committed and my own signature was inscribed beneath the writing.”
אָזִיל הַאי יְהוּדָאִי לַגָּלִיל הָעֶלְיוֹן וְשָׁאִיל בְּכָל אֲתָר: אִית הָכָא גְּבַר דְּמִית מִקָּרוֹב וְשָׁבִיק חַד יַנּוּקָא? אָמְרוּ לֵיהּ: אִין. יַנּוּקָא דָּא אָזִיל בְּבֵית מִטְבָּחַיָּא, וְאִיהוּ רָשָׁע כַּאֲבוּהִי. אָזִיל הַאי גַּבְרָא לְבֵית מִטְבָּחַיִם וְאַשְׁגַּח בְּהַהוּא יַנּוּקָא וְחָזִי לֵיהּ, דַּהֲוֵי מְצַחֵק עִם הַנְּעָרִים בְּבֵית מִטְבָּחַיִם. אָמַר לֵיהּ הַאי יְהוּדָאִי: בְּנִי, זִיל עִמָּדִי, אָזִיל עִמֵּיהּ וְאַלְבִּישׁ יְתֵיהּ וְיָהִיב לֵיהּ לְרַב אֶחָד, דַּהֲוָה אוֹלִיף לֵיהּ אוֹרַיְתָא. וְלָמַד הַרְבֵּה עִם הַנַּעַר, עַד דַּהֲוֵי בָּחוּר חָשׁוּב שֶׁבַּתַּלְמִידִים. וְאַחַר כָּךְ הָיָה לוֹמֵד עִמּוֹ הַהַפְטָרָה בְּבֵית הַכְּנֶסֶת, וְהָיָה מִתְפַּלֵּל עִם הַצִּבּוּר בְּבֵית הַכְּנֶסֶת, וְאַחַר כָּךְ נִתְחַכֵּם עוֹד, עַד שֶׁהָיוּ קוֹרִין לוֹ 'רַבִּי'. וְאַחַר כָּךְ בָּא אוֹתוֹ רָשָׁע בַּחֲלוֹם לְהַאי יְהוּדָאִי וְאָמַר לוֹ: רַבִּי, הַקָּדוֹשׁ בָּרוּךְ הוּא יְנַחֵם אוֹתְךָ כַּאֲשֶׁר נִחַמְתָּנִי. כִּי בְּשַׁעְתָּא דְּאָמַר בְּרִי הַפְטָרָה בַּקָּהָל, פָּטְרוּ לִי מִן דִּינָא קַשְׁיָא, וּבְשַׁעְתָּא דַּהֲוֵי מִתְפַּלֵּל וְאָמַר קַדִּישׁ, קָרְעוּ גְּזַר דִּינִי מִכֹּל וָכֹל. וּבְשַׁעְתָּא דְּאִתְחַכַּם בְּרִי, וְקַרְיָן לֵיהּ 'רַבִּי', אִתְעַטְּרוּ לִי בְּכִתְרָא דְּצַדִּיקַיָּא, וּבִשְׁבִילְךָ זָכִינָא לְהַאי יְקָר. זַכָּאָה חוּלָקָךְ דְּאַיְתָּת יָתִי לְחַיֵּי עוֹלָם הַבָּא; זַכָּאָה חוּלָקָךְ בָּעוֹלָם הַזֶּה, וְזַכָּאָה חוּלָקָךְ בָּעוֹלָם הַבָּא!
Afterwards the Jew went from place to place in the Upper Galilee inquiring whether anyone had recently died leaving a young son. Finally in a certain place he received a positive response and was informed that the child had gone to the slaughterhouse and that he was as evil as his father. So the man went to the slaughterhouse and contemplated the child, who was playing with the youths who were there. The Jew said to him, “My son, come with me.” So he came with him and the man provided him with clothes and found him a teacher to teach him Torah. The teacher taught him a great deal until he became one of the most promising of the students. Then he taught him to read from the [Book of] Prophets in the Synagogue and to pray with the congregation. The young man grew even more learned until eventually people began to call him “Rabbi.” At that point the evildoer appeared to the Jew in a dream and said to him, “Rabbi, may the Holy One Blessed is He console you as you have consoled me. For when my son read from the Prophets in the synagogue they exempted me from harsh judgment. And when he led the prayers and recited Kaddish they tore up my sentence in Gehinnom altogether. “And when my son grew more learned and they began calling him “Rabbi,” I was crowned with the crown of the righteous. It was only because of you that I earned all this merit. Fortunate is your lot, for you have brought me into the World to Come. Fortunate is your lot in this world and fortunate is your lot in the World to Come!”
וְכֵן מָצִינוּ גַּם כֵּן מַעֲשֶׂה בְּרַבִּי עֲקִיבָא, שֶׁפָּגַע בְּאָדָם רָשָׁע, וְהָיוּ מַשְׁחִיתִים דָּנִין אוֹתוֹ הָרָשָׁע בְּיִסּוּרִים, עַד שֶׁשָּׁאַל רַבִּי עֲקִיבָא אוֹתוֹ אִם יֵשׁ לוֹ בֵּן, וְהֵשִׁיב שֶׁיֵּשׁ לוֹ בְּמָקוֹם פְּלוֹנִי. וְהָלַךְ רַבִּי עֲקִיבָא לְאוֹתוֹ הַמָּקוֹם וְלָמַד עִם בְּנוֹ קַדִּישׁ, וְאַחַר כָּךְ 'אָמֵן יְהֵא שְׁמֵיהּ רַבָּא מְבָרַךְ לְעָלַם וּלְעָלְמֵי עָלְמַיָּא'. מִיָּד נֶחֱלַץ אוֹתוֹ הָרָשָׁע מֵהַצָּרָה. וְנִתְגַּלָּה לָרַבִּי עֲקִיבָא, וְגִלָּה כִּי הֻתַּר הוּא מִיִּסּוּרִים דִּילֵיהּ. פָּתַח רַבִּי עֲקִיבָא וְאָמַר: ה', זִכְרְךָ לְדוֹר וְדוֹר.
We find a similar incident in Kallah Rabbasi (Chapter 2) in which Rabbi Akiva encountered an evildoer to whom the destroying angels were administering punishment. Rabbi Akiva asked him if he had a son, to which he replied that he did. He also told him where the boy lived. So Rabbi Akiva went to that place and taught the boy to recite the Kaddish. Then the boy responded, Amein, yehei shemeih raba mevorach le’olam ulolmei olmayo, and the evildoer was immediately released from his suffering. Afterwards he appeared to Rabbi Akiva and informed him that he had been freed from his afflictions. Rabbi Akiva then recited the verse, “Hashem, Your remembrance endures throughout the generations!” (Tehillim 135:13).
וּמִזֶּה הוּא הִתְעוֹרְרוּת אֶל הָאָדָם, שֶׁיָּשִׂים עֵינוֹ וְהַשְׁגָּחָתוֹ הַגְּדוֹלָה עַל בָּנָיו לְלַמְּדָם בְּתוֹרַת ה' וּלְהַדְרִיכָם בְּיִרְאַת ה', כִּי בְּרָא מְזַכֶּה אַבָּא. וּמִי שֶׁמֵּת לוֹ אָבִיו אוֹ אִמּוֹ — יִזָּהֵר אוֹתוֹ הַבֵּן לוֹמַר קַדִּישׁ וְ'אָמֵן יְהֵא שְׁמֵיהּ רַבָּא' בְּכָל כֹּחוֹ, כִּי בַּאֲמִירָתוֹ הוּא מֵבִיא לְמַעְלָה נִשְׁמַת אָבִיו לְגַן עֵדֶן הָעֶלְיוֹן. וְלֹא כְּיֵשׁ הַמְּקִלִּין בַּקַּדִּישִׁים, שֶׁהוּא בְּעֵינֵיהֶם כַּאֲחוּכֵי וּטְלוּלֵי, וּמַמָּשׁ הֵן מְלַגְלְגִין עַל אֲמִירַת הַקַּדִּישׁ, וְלֹא יוֹדְעִים שֶׁכָּל מַעֲשֵׂי שָׁמַיִם וָאֶרֶץ תְּלוּיִין בַּאֲמִירַת הַקַּדִּישׁ, כִּי 'אָמֵן יְהֵא שְׁמֵיהּ רַבָּא מְבָרַךְ לְעָלַם וּלְעָלְמַיָּא' הֵם עֶשְׂרִים וּשְׁמוֹנֶה אוֹתִיּוֹת. כְּנֶגֶד זֶה יֵשׁ עֶשְׂרִים וּשְׁמוֹנֶה אוֹתִיּוֹת בְּפֶרֶק רִאשׁוֹן שֶׁבַּתּוֹרָה: בְּרֵאשִׁית בָּרָא אֱלֹהִים אֶת הַשָּׁמַיִם וְאֶת הָאָרֶץ — בְּסוֹד 'כֹּחַ מַעֲשָׂיו הִגִּיד לְעַמּוֹ'. וְכֵן פָּסוּק רִאשׁוֹן שֶׁבַּעֲשֶׂרֶת הַדִּבְּרוֹת הֵן עֶשְׂרִים וּשְׁמוֹנֶה אוֹתִיּוֹת 'וַיְדַבֵּר אֱלֹהִים אֶת כָּל הַדְּבָרִים הָאֵלֶּה לֵאמֹר'. וְלָכֵן הָיָה מְצַוֶּה רַבֵּנוּ יְהוּדָה חָסִיד: כְּשֶׁמַּתְחִיל הַשְּׁלִיחַ צִבּוּר קַדִּישׁ, יֹאמְרוּ הַקָּהָל פָּסוּק 'וַיְדַבֵּר אֱלֹהִים וְגוֹ'', וְאַחַר כָּךְ — 'אָמֵן יְהֵא שְׁמֵיהּ רַבָּא' וְסוֹדוֹ מְבֹאָר בַּסֵּפֶר 'מְגַלֶּה עֲמֻקּוֹת', אֹפֶן ריב, עַיֵּן שָׁם.
This should awaken a person to watch over his children carefully and to teach them Torah and guide them in awe of Hashem because a son can bring his father merit. By the same token, one whose father or mother has passed away must be scrupulous in reciting the Kaddish and responding, Amein, yehei shemeih raba, with all his might. For through this he elevates his father’s soul to the upper Gan Eden. Let him not emulate those who take the Kaddish lightly, treating it as a kind of joke and actually making sport of its recital. They do not realize that Heaven and earth depend on the Kaddish. The response, Amein, yehei shemeih raba, contains twenty-eight letters, corresponding to the twenty-eight letters in the first verse of the Torah, “In the beginning God created the Heaven and the earth” (Bereishis 1:1). This is an allusion to what is stated in Tehillim, “The power of His deeds He has declared to His people” (111:6). For the numerical value of the word “power” — koach — is twenty-eight. The first verse of the Ten Commandments also contains twenty-eight letters: “And God spoke all these things, saying” (Shemos 20:1). Therefore our teacher Rabbi Yehudah Chassid used to instruct the congregation to recite the first verse of Bereishis, followed by the one from the Ten Commandments and afterwards, Amein, yehei shemeih raba. The esoteric meaning of this custom is explained in Megaleh Amukos (Ofen 212).
עַל כֵּן צָרִיךְ הָאָדָם הָאוֹמֵר קַדִּישׁ אַחַר אָבִיו וְאִמּוֹ, לוֹמַר בְּכַוָּנָה גְּדוֹלָה הַקַּדִּישׁ, וְגַם מְחֻיָּב הָאָבֵל לוֹמַר גַּם כֵּן: אָמֵן יְהֵא שְׁמֵיהּ רַבָּא כוּ'. וְלֹא כְּיֵשׁ עַמֵּי הָאֲרָצוֹת, שֶׁאוֹמְרִים רַק 'וְאִמְרוּ אָמֵן' וְאַחַר כָּךְ מַתְחִילִין תֵּכֶף 'יִתְבָּרַךְ וְיִשְׁתַּבַּח', אֶלָּא צָרִיךְ הָאָבֵל לוֹמַר גַּם כֵּן 'יְהֵא שְׁמֵיהּ רַבָּה' כִּי עִקַּר הַקַּדִּישׁ הוּא בַּאֲמִירַת 'אָמֵן יְהֵא שְׁמֵיהּ רַבָּה'. וּבָזֶה הוּא עוֹשֶׂה נַחַת רוּחַ לְהַקָּדוֹשׁ בָּרוּךְ הוּא, לְאָבִיו וּלְאִמּוֹ. וּמִי שֶׁאֵין לוֹ בָּנִים, עָלָיו לְגַדֵּל יָתוֹם בְּתוֹךְ בֵּיתוֹ וּלְגַדְּלוֹ לְתוֹרָה וְלַעֲבוֹדַת ה', כִּי פֶּן וְאוּלַי אָבִיו וְאִמּוֹ שֶׁל הַיָּתוֹם הָיוּ רְשָׁעִים, וְעַל יְדֵי בְּנוֹ הַיָּתוֹם מְזַכֶּה אֶת אָבִיו וְאִמּוֹ. אֲזַי יֵשׁ לְהַמְגַדֵּל שָׂכָר הַרְבֵּה בָּעוֹלָם הַזֶּה וּבָעוֹלָם הַבָּא. אֲבָל מִי שֶׁמְּגַדֵּל יָתוֹם בְּתוֹךְ בֵּיתוֹ כְּדֵי שֶׁיִּהְיֶה לוֹ עֶבֶד, לֹא דַּי שֶׁאֵינוֹ מְקַבֵּל שָׂכָר עַל מִצְוָה זוֹ, אֶלָּא אֲפִלּוּ עָנְשׁוֹ מְרֻבֶּה, כִּי כְּשֵׁם שֶׁבְּרָא טָבָא מְזַכֶּה אַבָּא, כָּךְ בְּרָא בִּישָׁא הוּא גּוֹרֵם דִּמְעַנְּשִׁין אֶת אָבִיו וְאִמּוֹ, וְכָל זְמַן שֶׁאָבִיו וְאִמּוֹ קַיָּמִים, וְלֹא הָיוּ מוֹכִיחִין אֶת בְּנָם, לָכֵן עֲווֹן בָּנִים פּוֹקֵד עַל אָבוֹת. אֲבָל מִי שֶׁמַּנִּיחַ בֵּן קָטָן, וְאַחַר מְגַדֵּל אוֹתוֹ — אֲזַי אֵין מְעַנְּשִׁין אֶת אָבִיו, כִּי אִם אֶת הָאִישׁ הַמְגַדֵּל, וְעַל זֶה נֶאֱמַר: אִישׁ בְּחֶטְאוֹ יוּמְתוּ.
In light of this a mourner reciting Kaddish for a parent should be careful to recite it with great concentration. It is important that the one reciting Kaddish also respond, Amein, yehei shemeih raba. Let him not emulate the ignorant who stop at the words, “And say Amein” [ve’imru Amein] and then continue with the words “May the name be blessed and praised” [yisborach veyishtabach]. Rather, he must also say, Amein, yehei shemeih raba because that is the most essential part of the Kaddish. In this way he brings pleasure to the Holy One Blessed is He as well as to his father and mother. If a person has no sons let him take an orphan into his home and raise him in the study of Torah and the service of Hashem. For perhaps the father and mother of the orphan were wicked and now their son will bring them merit. Then the one who raised him will have earned a great reward in this world and the next. On the other hand, if someone raises an orphan in his home only in order that he should serve him, then not only does he receive no reward, he is severely punished. For just as a virtuous son brings merit to his father, so does a wicked son cause his parents to be punished because they failed to rebuke him while they were alive. It is for this reason that the sin of the son is visit upon his parents. But if the deceased left a young son and someone else raised him, then they do not punish the father but the one who raised him. Concerning this was it stated, “Each man for his own sin shall they be killed” (Devarim 24:16).
עַל כֵּן אַצִּיג לְךָ פֶּרֶק מְיֻחָד, שֶׁמְּדַבֵּר בְּעִנְיַן גִּדּוּל בָּנִים, שֶׁהָאָב מְצַוֶּה עַל בְּנוֹ לְהוֹכִיחַ אוֹתוֹ, וְהַבֵּן הוּא מְצֻוֶּה לְקַיֵּם דִּבְרֵי אָבִיו, כְּדֵי שֶׁלֹּא יֹאמְרוּ בִּשְׁבִילוֹ: אָרוּר שֶׁזֶּה יְלָדוֹ, אָרוּר שֶׁזֶּה גִּדְּלוֹ — וְאָז יֵלֵךְ בְּלִי כִּסּוּפָא לָעוֹלָם הַבָּא. אָמֵן.
Therefore I will now present you with a chapter devoted to the subject of raising children. There it will be noted that a father is commanded to rebuke his son while the son is commanded to fulfill his father’s words. This is in order that people will not say of him, “Cursed is the one who bore him; cursed is the one who raised him” (Sanhedrin 52a). Then he will be able to go to the next world without shame, Amein.